Tuesday, April 8, 2008

brits that i have loved and lusted after: the short list

part 1: in no particular order:
1. matt grant: the bachelor
he's tall (6'5"), handsome, charming, loves to drink, looks great in rugby gear and probably knows how to knit a sweater and build a fire in the woods. i can see us together kicking a ball around, taking champagne breaks and peeing side by side at matching latrines without rancor.

2. eric bana: the star
strictly speaking, bana is not a brit but, being from australia, he certainly is/was a british subject: actually england used australia as a penal colony many years ago.
anyway, i just watched him in a film called lucky me in which he played a professional gambler, an american. his hair is long and he doesn't turn green or burst out of his shirt or battle with brad pitt but he is adorable in a beaten, rumpled, beautifully doomed way: just my kind of guy. he and i would have many children and i would bake him apple pies as well as wipe his butt after he used the facilities.

3. daniel craig: the sex pot
though mr craig certainly came to acting prominence with his james bond, i have known him for years in a number of his quirky film roles as in the mother in which he fucked a much much older woman: no not his mother but someone else's.
but i don't want daniel to fuck anyone but me. we would live in surrey. i would drive a cab and meet him daily after his movie work and we would share a guinness, a plate of dried cod and bubbles and squeak. then we would go home and make love 5 or 6times.

4. tony blair: former pm
nothing is sexier than a man with power and tony blair is one sexy dude. yeah i know, he's not handsome and all but he is intelligent, well spoken and cute in a geeky way. it is also rumored that he is a jackal in the sack. life with tony would be a whirlwind of social engagements at the opera and the theatre but we would still have time to play bridge and drink loads of tea. i would bake him crumpets every morning before i went off to a day of psychoanalyzing cute rugby players. out life would be one of weekdays in the city and weekends at our home in dover.

5. jude law: the chameleon
one of the things i like about jude is that he changes his hair color as often as he does his underwear. in this picture, taken outside the dorchester on his way to take me to dinner last december he is dressed to impress. impress whom is the question, innit? carefully check out what he is wearing in this photo: jeans, jeans jacket, white tee shirt, armani cashmere shortie trench, snow boots and a beige skull cap and we were going to gordon ramsey's restaurant for dinner!
jude is a cuddly kind of dude. he likes to french kiss and is a master felcher. a long life with jude is out of the question as he is a major playa...just ask sienna miller. but i'll take him for as long as i can have him, wouldn't you?
part 2 of the list includes such sex gods as clive owen, robson green and daniel day lewis...stay tuned

american idol: the dread locked dude once again demolished a classic song: this week over the rainbow in which he accompanied himself on the ukulele....a UKULELE!
the daughtry-clone wore a white military inspired jacket and yelled his head off to maximum audience acclaim.

i listened to a lot of stuff today: the cult,led zeppelin, heavenly,talk. talk, maria callas, renata scotto, erykah badu, kaskade...

1 comment:

dit said...

Brits are often so darned sexy!